You Are Not, But Love

Today I received an email from a very dear friend who is going through tough time. To say it’s a rather difficult period of his life wouldn’t do it justice. He’s been this way for as long as I have known him. Despite his inner darkness, he has shown me the light in so many ways.

He is not only a friend, but a brother. Not just a student but a teacher. Not a nobody, but a very special someone who has inspired me to love on a deeper level, and to allow myself to live into my truth and be vulnerable. He doesn’t not judge me unfairly, or perhaps not at all. He saves that only for himself. While he is trapped in his emotional prison, he has freed me.

​He told me once that not having me in his life would be like missing a finger. Not having him in my life would be like missing a foot. He always keeps me balanced, and on all ten of my toes.

In response to his letter, I wrote him these words that I think all of us need to hear.

You are not a failure. You are love.
You are not a loser. You are love.
You are not lazy. You are love.
You are not wrong. You are love.
You are not guilty. You are love.
You are not weak. You are love.
You are not stupid. You are love.
You are not pathetic. You are love.
You are not unsuccessful. You are love.
You are not unreasonable. You are love.
You are not hard. You are love.
You are not soft. You are love.
You are not childish. You are love.
You are not grumpy. You are love.
You are not difficult. You are love.
You are not terrible. You are love.
You are not broken. You are love.
You are not flawed. You are love.
You are not damaged. You are love.
You are not abnormal. You are love.
You are not ugly. You are love.
You are not a mistake. You are love.
You are not unwanted. You are love.
You are not what you keep telling yourself. You are love.
​The perfect image of God.

Never forget that everyone feels one of these, if not all of these, at some period in life. This list is not exhaustive. Nor is it static. It grows as we continue to add ourselves, our pain, our negative beliefs to the list. Yet no matter how much it grows, not matter how may adjectives and layers of our emotional baggage we bring, one thing remains constant and sure. The perfect image of God, for which by some divine mystery, includes you and me and everyone else. If God is love, then so are we. No matter what.